
Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/6741409.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Underage
  Category:
      M/M
  Fandom:
      Homestuck
  Relationship:
      Jake_English/Dirk_Strider
  Character:
      Jake_English, Dirk_Strider
  Additional Tags:
      Alpha_Session, First_Time, tomb_raiding, introvert_jake
  Stats:
      Published: 2016-05-03 Words: 6526
****** Thrills and Chills ******
by ayyyy_(RosaAquafire)
Summary
     Jake is excited to see Dirk, thinking of how he wanted to kiss him
     last night before bed, but didn't. He's also really frigging nervous
     to see him, thinking of how he wanted to kiss him last night before
     bed, but didn't. He thinks he recognizes what he's feeling from
     movies. 'Thrill' is the word, he thinks. Nerves and anticipation
     coming together.
Notes
See the end of the work for notes
Jake wakes up to the sound of water running.

He blinks and rolls over in bed. The bed feels different. Less bounce. He rubs
his eyes with the back of his forearm and the air smells strange. No fresh
green, no rich earth. Smells like metal. And... chemicals. Like when he's left
out a nugget of uranium overnight, working on something. And something else.
Smells like...

Smells like Dirk.

All at once, he remembers where he is and sits upright. He tugs the sheets up
against his chest. There are cinder blocks by his head, a full sound system and
large screen telly on the far wall, and a fan blasting in the corner. Distant
thunder rolls. This isn't his room. His room, his entire orb, his entire
island, it's all lost back on a dying planet and he's never going to see it
again. It's gone. Adios.

For a second, he just lets himself be sad about that all over again.

He can't figure out how the water is still running here. It doesn't make any
sense to him. But Dirk's shower lives on, and he thinks that Dirk thinks that
he's still asleep, because he had hear Dirk faintly singing. He has a sweet,
smooth tenor voice. It's a lot nicer than his rapping vocals. Jake doesn't
recognize the song, but he's never been much for music, so that's not a
surprise.

He swings his feet over the edge of the bed. Dirk doesn't have a box spring or
a frame, just a mattress on the floor. He finds his shorts in a pile. He'd been
nervous about taking them off. Dirk had given him a look. I'm not going to
wander in in the middle of the night or anything, bro, he'd said. I can be
cool.

Jake had made some quip back. Yeah well the friggin jury's still out on that,
mister. Something. He'd mostly been doing it to cover how embarrassed he was to
have been so embarrassed. Dirk was being nice, offering to let Jake take his
bed, let him get away from the frigging spooky ringing whispering silence that
filled the open air of his planet. The Land of Mounds and Xenon is gorgeous,
peaceful, and brimming with things to learn and discover, until you're alone
there for long enough. And then the peaceful air develops this malicious sort
of hum and you start to swear there are a million eyes on you and you're there,
all alone, with no way off the planet and not even your jungle orb to hide in
because all you brought with you are the ruined foundations of the big happy
home a fish alien overlord had blown up ten years ago.

It had all started making Jake a little loopy.

And Dirk was eager to spend more time together, and Jake was honestly looking
forward to it, too. A week in this session and the lot of them getting their
bearings had been great. The berries! He'd taken some time to just get to know
his planet and understand the nature of this game and solve some puzzles and
work through the still red-hot memory of Dirk's blood and spinal fluids coating
his hands and forearms.  He'd needed that. He thought they all did. Time to
themselves. Puzzling things out. Getting their noggins all arranged in good
order. And then meeting up and talking about things, eating Jane's brownies,
making plans, figuring things out.

And then Dirk stopping him outside and saying, hey, remember that thing we
talked about right after we entered the session and whatnot? And Jake had
remembered, because he still smiled awkwardly and felt a knot in his stomach
every time he thought about it. Dirk's self assured, practiced words. The
inevitability of it. The relief when he'd agreed, sure, Dirk, I'll be your
boyfriend. The pressure of Dirk's lips on his, an awkward wonderful little kiss
that had promised things to come and made him pretty darned terrified about his
total inexperience at the same time. Spending time together sounded great. It
sounded aces. Spend the night on Dirk's lumpy crappy mattress and then wake up
ready to face the world.

The water shuts off and Dirk abruptly stops singing. Jake hides a smile and
decides not to let him know that he heard anything. He throws on his shirt and
his jacket and eventually finds his glasses.

He wipes sweaty palms on his shorts. Dirk is moving around in the apartment,
now. Jake is excited to see him, thinking of how he wanted to kiss him last
night before bed, but didn't. He's also really frigging nervous to see him,
thinking of how he wanted to kiss him last night before bed, but didn't. He
thinks he recognizes what he's feeling from movies. Thrill is the word, he
thinks. Nerves and anticipation coming together at the same time.

He really should go out there. He pokes around Dirk's room. Drawing tablet.
Posters that run the gamut from awesome movies and extreme weirdness. A whole
lot of plushes with really defined asses. Like, super defined. Jake has to take
a minute just to admire. He really ought to go out there.

He squares his shoulders and walks out.

When he reaches the kitchen, Dirk half-turns and tosses him something in a blur
of green. His hair is wet, loose, and he isn't wearing his shades. It's such a
shocking sight that Jake almost fumbles the object before he catches it two-
handed. Dirk is already off talking. "Hey, morning. Sleep good? If you're
hungry, I made breakfast, and by 'made breakfast,' I mean 'opened a can of
peaches all by myself, yo.'"

Jake looks at what he's holding. It's some sort of gas mask, like from the
movies, but it's green and has skull teeth and is emblazoned with the SkaiaNet
logo he's used to seeing from Grandma's tech. He immediately loves it.

Dirk sees him studying it. "Oh, yeah. I fired up the alchemiter and made these.
What do you think?" He holds up another one.

It's red, there are flames up the side, and it's wearing Dirk's lame anime
shades. Jake can't help but snort. "Oh sweet jumping Jephosefuck," he laughs.
"You've gotta be plain stonking barmy if you think I'm going to be seen in
public with you, wearing that thing."

"Laugh it up," Dirk says with a sour look, and turns to spoon bright orange
peaches into bowls. More thunder rolls off in the distance. It never seems to
stop storming on this planet. "We're not going out in public, we're going down
into a tomb I scouted out as soon as you eat something." He slides the bowl
across the table.

There's a burst of irritation and panic combined that happens somewhere in
Jake's chest. He doesn't like it, so he sweeps it away. He focuses on the bit
that sticks out in Dirk's words, the bit that makes his ears perk up like a
dog. "Tomb?"

"Fuck, yeah," Dirk agrees. He grins and sits down on his side of the table,
chair backwards, and Jake feels weird standing up so he takes his seat, too. He
tries a bite of the peaches. Oh. Shit, they're really good. "We're going tomb
raiding like Lara fuckin' Croft up in here, English. I know how to show a guy a
good time."

The words remind Jake that they're not just best friends anymore. That Dirk
likes him. That Dirk has always liked him. That they're a couple. That his lips
are still haunted by the phantom pressure Dirk had pressed against them
yesterday. He flushes, looks up, meets Dirk's eyes. Flushes again, looks down,
eats his peaches. The peaches are the exact colour of Dirk's eyes, he notices.

There's a long moment of silence, and Jake enjoys his peaches. They taste a
whole lot better than the fresh peaches he picked on his island. He misses his
island badly. It's an ache in his chest, but he doesn't like it, so he sweeps
it away.

"Right," Dirk says, and something in his voice makes Jake think that maybe he
was waiting for a response? "As far as I can tell, this planet is actually
lousy with tombs. Land of Tombs and Krypton, from what I've read on bas-reliefs
and shit on the upper levels I've gotten to with the rocket board. Upper levels
because it's also lousy with Krypton, who fucking knew!  It's a well named
planet. Krypton sinks, so it's only the lower levels where the levels are
toxic. Unfortunately, that's also where all the tombs are. But we've got this,
bro." He taps his dumb red flames-and-shades gas mask with authority.

It's so frigging silly. Jake laughs. "Where the blue blazes do you get off
calling me a dork?" he asks.

"It's tangentially related to what a fuckin' dork you are," Dirk points out.

"At least I don't wear anime shades and think I'm the bees knees!"

Dirk gives him a look. "You're cute when you smile," he says, and they both
freeze, and Dirk clears his throat and stands up and turns his back and
vanishes from the room like his ass is on fire. Jake looks at his ass. It's
flat and bony and he can barely tell that it's there through Dirk's loose
pants, but he kind of likes it anyway, he thinks? Oh, lordy.

He can't stop blushing as he makes fast work of the peaches. The words play
over in his head. Does he like them? Yeah, he decides. Yeah, he likes them.
That same nervous/excited energy from before has taken up residence in his
chest. Thrill. He tries on the gasmask and it fits like a glove.

Dirk reappears. His hair is spiked up and he's got those dumb shades on. Jake
finds that he misses his eyes. Both the sweet canned-peaches colour and the
insight into what the dude is actually thinking. He's got his rocket board
under one arm. It's red and has flames on it. Dirk is such a frigging nerd.

"Ready to head on out?" Dirk asks, and Jake climbs to his feet. He drank the
syrup out of the bowl and he hopes that he was supposed to do that and it
wasn't weird. He hasn't actually eaten using a bowl for years, but he's pretty
sure he can remember Grandma telling him not to eat right off the ceramics like
an animal. Dirk doesn't seem to notice either way.

Jake follows him up a flight of stairs. He remembers them from last night.
Remembers watching Dirk's shoulder blades moving beneath the fabric of his
wife-beater. Remembers wanting to reach out and touch them. Dirk's body looks
so hard and sharp that Jake finds himself itching to know what it actually
feels like. Today, Dirk's wearing a t-shirt.  No shoulder blades haunt Jake all
the way back up the stairs.

"Alright," Dirk says, dropping the rocket board onto the concrete surface of
the roof and giving it a little kick. "The spot I've scouted out isn't too far
away. I'd put the mask on now, just in case. Krypton isn't actually toxic, by
the way. It's not going to poison you. You just won't be able to breathe in and
you'll probably suffocate and fall of the board and bash your head in. That'd
be bad."

Jake obeys, putting the mask  back on and tightening the traps behind his head.
Dirk does the same, and mounts the board. This time, when he kicks it, it
bounces a bit and jumps up off the ground. It hovers a good inch above the
surface. Jake's seen it already -- ridden it already -- but shucky fucking darn
if it isn't cool as balls.

Last night, he'd just kind of stood on the board behind Dirk. His footing had
been awful unstable and he'd almost taken a few of those tumbles Dirk was
talking about. But he'd been too scared and too self conscious to wrap his arms
around his friend -- his boyfriend, hell that's weird -- without permission.
He'd found some time before falling asleep to scold himself on being such a
yellow-bellied doof, and promised himself he'd take more initiative next time.

Okay, big talker. It's next time.

He climbs up behind Dirk. The board bobs a little, adjusting to his weight. He
swallows hard and moves in close to Dirk. He slides his arms around his waist.
He pulls in close. Dirk's body is solid and sharp and warm, and he feels the
thrill again.

Dirk goes tense. "Oh," he says, muffled by the mask.

Jake regrets everything. "Shit," he says, "darn me to fucking heck, Dirk, I
just thought -- well, never mind what I thought, I'll --" He goes to pull back.

Dirk grabs his wrists. Pulls him back in. "No way," he says. His voice is a
little strained. "No way, it's cool, bro. I, uh, I was just surprised. I didn't
expect... that is, I didn't think you'd go for it?"

Jake's tempted to tell a lie, the familiar, comfortable sort of lie he's really
used to telling. But it's dumb and heavy and stupid on his tongue, because why
bother? That ship has sailed, and he and Dirk are sitting in the crow's nest,
K-I-S-S-I-N-G. There's nothing to deflect. He doesn't have to make time to
think about this, to worry about whether Dirk or Jane or Roxy or UU likes him
and wonder whether or not he should like them back and bide his time until he
gets a sec to actually unpack the whole thing and think about it. He's thought
about it. The genie is out of the bottle. He and Dirk are dating.

"It didn't seem like you were really gearing up to get anywhere with it," he
says, instead. It comes out a bit defensive. "A guy worries he's not the looker
he hoped he was, when it's been a solid twenty-four and all he gets is one
little peck."

Dirk relaxes. Jake smiles. "I can give you more than a peck," Dirk says, and
there's a low sort of edge to his voice that brings the whole thrill thing up
to a new level.

And then Dirk is kicking off and they're flying. Jake doesn't think he's scared
of heights but he doesn't want to find out, so he buries his masked face
against Dirk. Even through the filter on the mask, Dirk smells... really good.
Clean and fresh. Flowery? It's that expensive shampoo and hair gel he uses,
probably. But there's a patch of hair right at the nape of his neck that he
missed styling up, and it looks wispy and soft and it's just about the colour
of peaches, too.

Jake decides that he really wants to kiss Dirk. Other parts of him decide that,
too, and Jake just pretends that Dirk can't feel them stirring to life and
pressing up against... well, right about up against his behind, actually.
That's fun.

They're coming in for a landing, circling an outcropping in one of the towering
teal buildings. Dirk angles the board down, and Jake is pushed up against his
back closer. He gets this idea in his head, heart beating and thrill going down
his spine, that the second Dirk kicks the thing to a landing, he's going to
shock his socks off by grabbing him and pushing him against the closest wall
and kiss him hard.

It isn't until a second before they land when Jake realizes the flaw in his
quixotic plan: the fucking gas masks. He can't kiss Dirk at all. They're just
going to bump snouts awkwardly and he's going to feel like a dumper.

He already feels like a dumper as Dirk glides the board to a stop. He jerks
back like Dirk's body is hot, not just warm, and steps off, onto the crumbling
green ground. He sticks his hands in his armpits and tries to regroup as Dirk
grabs the board and captchalogues it. "All right," he says. Jake thinks he
might be imagining the little edge in his voice until he kicks awkwardly at the
ground. Jake smiles. Okay. Okay, so Dirk had big plans too that got kicked in
by the stupid masks or his own brain and that makes him feel better.

"Okey doke," Jake agrees with nothing, but Dirk nods anyway.

"Tomb is this way," he says, jerking a thumb in the only direction they can go
in. The awkwardness is kind of endearing. Jake knows Dirk can't see him smiling
through the mask. He can't decide if he's glad about that or not.You're cute
when you smile. He thinks he doesn't mind being cute at all, especially when
Dirk is as tongue-tied as he is. He watches as Dirk shoves his hands into his
pockets. "I didn't go very deep. Just landed here and made sure that I was
right about it. Got the location from some puzzles further up." He cocks his
head and starts walking in that direction. Jake follows after him. "Got your
strife specibus lined up?"

"Always!" Jake shoots back, indignant. He whips his hands into position, calls
the barettas forth, and feels them slide into grip, smooth as butter. His
fingers fit against the triggers and he grins. "Locked and loaded," he says,
because he always says something like that when he gets his pistols in his
hands, and he realizes that maybe that's lame, but Dirk looks over his shoulder
and gives him a thumbs up. Jake can't even see his eyes through the dumb build
in shades, but he's pretty sure he's smiling.

"Good stuff, Lara. Based on some of the stuff Jane was saying her and Rox found
on Locah, I'm pretty sure we're going to run into some of those skeleton
monsters they caught glimpses of. Not sure what that's about. From what I've
been able to decode of these puzzles, the monsters here are supposed to be
something called Underlings. I'm not sure what or who they serve, but they're
supposed to be prime sources of grist."

"That's that whatsit Jane said we need to build our houses?" Jake stores the
guns again, letting his arms hang at his sides.

"And use the alchemiter. I, uh, might have jacked some of hers to make these."
Dirk taps at the mask. "But I think it'll pay off. Seems like all those dead
consorts we keep he hearing about stockpiled fuckin' hoards of the shit in
tombs like this."

"Holy Toledo," Jake breathes. He's actually starting to get pumped about the
whole endeavour, instead of thinking about how it was a little frustrating how
Dirk had just planned it all without telling him or consulting him -- he
sweeps  it away. "So this is like a real frigging bonafide tomb raid we're on
right now!"

"Hell yeah," Dirk agrees. He holds a fist and Jake gives it an enthusiastic
bump. "I know what my guy likes."

 The words hang in the air between them, and Jake jogs a couple steps so that
he can walk beside Dirk. They head deeper into the tomb, hands swinging just
right beside each other, until Jake gets fed up with how close they are and how
obviously they both want to do something. He threads his fingers in with
Dirk's.

The masks might hide Dirk's eyes and his face, but they amplify his breath.
Jake hears the sharp intake. It makes him flush and the thrill coils up in the
pit of his belly. He knows Dirk likes him. He's known Dirk likes him for a
really, really long time. But it's always been an academic sort of knowledge,
fueled mainly by the single-minded way that the damn auto-responder flirts and
harasses. Dirk himself has always been a cipher. That sharp intake of breath is
a whole lot of knowledge all at once.

Knowing someone likes you and wants to date you is one thing. This is
different. The knowledge that settles onto Jake now is something else -- the
knowledge that Dirk is affected by him. The knowledge that he has power over
Dirk. This isn't just his orange-text friend on the other side of a computer
screen. This is a flesh and blood human with sharp shoulder blades, peach-
coloured eyes, and wispy orange hair at the nape of his neck who  wants to be
with Jake English.

"Um," Dirk says. His voice is a little high and he's breathing a little harder.
Jake wonders if he's blushing under that mask. He really, really wishes he knew
for sure. "I'm, um. I'm really glad that you said yes.  You know, when we
talked yesterday. I thought -- I mean, I worried -- I mean -- that you wouldn't
even think about it. Cause I was, you know, a dude."

"I've --" Jake cuts himself off, cause he was going to say 'I've thought about
it a whole lot for a long time.' That's not the best thing to say.  It implies
a whole lot of things. Things like him maybe sitting alone in his jungle orb
and holding a photo Dirk's sent him and stroking himself off, just to see if it
could get him there. (Yeah, it definitely could.) Those things might all be
true, but he's still pretty sure he doesn't want them out there. "I don't mind
that you're a dude," he says instead. It comes out a little shy.

"Oh. I mean, cool." Pause. "I mean, I just. There was that time. You said maybe
we'd date if I weren't. A dude. So I was kind of worrying that caveat still
stood? I mean, I'm glad it doesn't! I just... want to check, you know? Make
sure that you're not... I mean, that the whole... dude thing. Isn't going to be
a problem."

He'd said yes, hadn't he? He'd spent the night at Dirk's place. He'd held him
close on the rocket board and popped a chub. For crying out loud, he's the one
who got the stones to get up close and take Dirk's hand! They're holding hands
like schoolyard lovers right now, because of Jake! Why the heck does Dirk have
to...

He doesn't like the feeling. So he sweeps it away.

He gets it. He really does. Dirk is worried that he's straight and lying to
himself. Jake's seen pretty much every movie ever made, here, so he recognizes
this plot line. He knows how to fix it. He squeezes Dirk's hand and moves in
closer to nudge at his shoulder. "It's not going to be a problemo," he
promises. "I'm down for the d -- um." He coughs. "The... dude."

Dirk laughs. "Yeah, okay." He sounds relieved as fuck, and that makes Jake feel
relieved, too. Okay. No need to get all crabby mcgee about it. Crisis averted.

They get to a sealed door.

Jake takes his hand out of Dirk's and examines the markings. There's a lot of
frogs. "You know," he wonders out loud, "I've always been low key thinking
this, but what the bejesus is with the freaking frogs? The ruins on my island
were all amphibian-esque, too. Doesn't that just strike your funny bone?"

"I've noticed it, too," Dirk says. Jake feels him close-by, a warm presence
radiating outwards. "Heard about it some on Derse, too, for that matter. At
least, I assume that when they're talking about 'King Pondsquatter,' that's a
frog thing. It sounds froggish."

"It does," Jake agrees. He thinks about Prospit and feels a weird burst of
envy. They'd passed close enough that he'd seen a glimpse of it -- all golden
towers and shimmering bridges. He envied Dirk getting to live in his kingdom,
even if his kingdom sounded a whole lot less wonderful.

They take some time and study all of the markings. Jake is super aware of
Dirk's presence, and occasionally they brush past each other and Jake feels
that thrill again. He daydreams about possibilities. Grabbing Dirk close and
running a hand up his chest. Pinning him against the wall, ripping off their
masks, and kissing him hard. Krypton doesn't poison -- just suffocates. Jake
can hold his breath for almost two minutes. And Dirk lived in waterworld, so he
can probably do even better. That's long enough to -- well, to get a real solid
kiss in.

He runs his fingers over the markings. Reads the inscriptions. Inspects the
door. He starts to get an inkling of how to get the door open, but keeps
getting distracted by Dirk's presence. He can't help but wonder if Dirk feels
it, too. Or is he so focused that all he sees is the mission? That sounds like
Dirk.

"I --" he says.

"I'm thinking --" Dirk begins at the exact same time, and then they both fall
into nervous laughter. Dirk rubs at the back of his neck and Jake thinks about
the soft hair there. Okay. Okay, so Dirk is all nerves and excitement, too.
That's good. Jake starts grinning behind his mask while Dirk clears his throat
and tries again.

"I've got this mostly figured out," he says. "These are panels. It wants us to
pick which two to flip to prove this statement written here. Pretty
straightforward shit. It's this one," he hits one of the panels and there's a
deep grinding noise. "And this --"

"Oh, shit, hold your horses there!" Jake says, diving in and pushing him aside.
He doesn't know what would happen if they get the answer wrong, but he doesn't
want to find out. He hits the panel beside the one Dirk had been going for, and
there's another loud grinding sound.

"What the fuck?" Dirk sounds really annoyed. "Dude. I had that! You got it
fucking wrong, and now --"

There's a hard noise like crumbling  rock, and the door slides up and open,
revealing a chamber beyond.

"Huh," Dirk says. He sounds halfway between embarrassed and impressed. "What
the hell? I was fucking sure..."

Jake could be annoyed, but he chooses not to be. He turns and winks. "I'm good
at this sort of thing," he says, and shrugs one shoulder. "I've been raiding
the old frog ruins since I was just a tot, you know."

"Yeah," Dirk says, and this time it's definitely impressed. Jake's glad he
didn't get annoyed, because now he gets to puff up without feeling guilty.
"Okay. That's pretty good. I really thought I had that. Damn."

They move into the chamber, and it's dark and stuffy and strangely warm inside.
Instinctively, Jake raises his hands and calls his pistols. He knows better
than to say some cool one-liner. There's a sort of mood about the circular
room, a tension hanging off of things. He sees a gleam of steel as Dirk wields
his sword. They creep quietly along opposite sides. The walls are featureless
and smooth. There doesn't seem to be anything in here at all.

Some ancient mechanism grinds inside the walls, and Jake is half-turned when
the door slides closed behind them with a bang. "Boondoggles!" Jake gasps, and
Dirk is suddenly at his side, moving so fast it doesn't seem possible.

"You okay?" Dirk asks. He sounds really worried. Jake nods.

"All copacetic," he says. He looks around. There's light coming from somewhere,
but not much... and there's a strange sort of hissing sound. Nothing moves.
Dirk's holding his sword at the ready, and everything is still. So Jake stashes
his pistols and reaches up for the straps of his mask.

"Careful," Dirk murmurs.

The air feels heavy in his lungs, but he can breath. He attaches the mask to
his belt. The air is clearing,  somehow. He remembers what Dirk said, about
Krypton sinking.

"There's gotta be a hole in the floor!" he realizes. That's the way out of here
for sure. Dirk removes his own mask beside him, letting it hang around his
neck, and something moves.

They both freeze. Jake's pistols are back in his hands in a second. He hears a
sound, a soft clattering like something being dragged along the floor. It's so
dark he can't see shit, but it's just light enough that he can tell there's
something in here with them. Something that came up through whatever trapdoor
let the krypton out and the oxygen in! Jake's heart is pounding in his head,
and he's terrified, but -- elated. This was  the sort of adventure he'd always
longed for. Real stakes, real challenges, and a partner at his side.

A flash of movement, and he fires.

A howl pierces the air, and he can make out the whatever-it-is recoiling in the
darkness, and whatever the whatever-it-is is, it's huge. It's long and it
clatters like a bang of bones as it shakes off the shot and then -- launches
forward.

Jake sees a skeletal face leaping out of the darkness, and then Dirk is before
him, sword outstretched. Whatever that dumb manime katana is made out of, it's
not just normal steel, because it slices through the skull and the thing veers
off into the darkness. Jake empties a clip into its retreating form,  bullet
shells clinking to the ground beside him.

That should be more than enough to kill the thing, the whatever it is,  but
it's still hissing and howling and bucking off in the darkness. Jake's eyes
have adjusted enough that he can make out a ribcage that goes on forever, three
pairs of legs, and half a face.

"It's still up!" Dirk calls out a warning, right before the thing strikes
again. Jake struggles with his reload while Dirk throws himself in front of it,
sword flashing in the dim light. "Oh, hell!" he gives up and raises his second
gun, sighting and firing into the line of the thing's sinuous spine. Bone
fragments explode everywhere. The thing screeches and loses its back legs, and
Jake's shots become clicks. He keeps forgetting to count his bullets!

"Cover me!" he shouts, and actually reloads. He gets the bullets from his
sylladex, fumbles getting them into the chambers, aware that Dirk is breathing
hard and the thing is moving.

"Down!" Dirk's voice pierces him, and he looks up just in time to shout in
terror before the thing pounces on him, its stubby front legs landing on his
shoulders and bowling him over. Its skullface is right up in his and at this
moment Jake decides that maybe skulls are a tiny bit overrated after all as he
puts his pistol under the thing's half-face and fires off the bullets he
managed to load. More chips of bones go everywhere and its face explodes
further, but it still has razor sharp skeleton teeth that look really freaking
sharp as it opens its jaws --

And then its head goes flying, teeth and all, and Dirk is standing over him.
The thing's legs are still scrabbling, but Dirk is hacking away and pieces are
flying, and the thing is finally still and well and truly dismembered. Jake
breaths so hard his lungs hurt. He doesn't think it has anything to do with the
Krypton.

Dirk is holding a hand down to him. "Shit," he says. "Holy shit. Holy fucking
shit, that was intense."

"Y-yeah," Jake agrees. He takes Dirk's hand. His heart is pounding and his head
is reeling and he feels... he feels...

He tightens his hand on Dirk's and, when Dirk goes to pull him up, Jake pulls
him down, instead.

Dirk lands with a puff of air, right on top of Jake. Jake wraps hands around
his neck and yanks him down, and has the image of Dirk's confused and hopeful
face just before their noses and lips smash together.

Ow. Mn. Both at once. Jake hums. He doesn't know what he's doing. He's pretty
sure Dirk doesn't know, either. His nose hurts and he thinks his lip is
bleeding, but he also feels the thrill in his spine, his belly, his throat, his
groin. Dirk is kissing him back, with crazy intense ferocity, and their tongues
are together, and his lip is definitely bleeding, and he doesn't care. He
threads his fingers through Dirk's stiff hair. Underneath the product, it's
fine and soft. Dirk shudders out a groan into his mouth.

Oh.

It's that sounds that really undoes him, for some reason. Dirk isn't an
implacable badass. Dirk is a warm body who moans into his mouth, whose hands
are running up his sides, who wants to be here. Who really wants to be here.
Jake sucks Dirk's bottom lip into his mouth. He nibbles. A shiver goes through
Dirk's entire body. Okay. Wow. Okay.

Jake's hands go up underneath Dirk's shirt without him really planning them to.
He finds Dirk's shoulder blades, and they're as sharp and hard and firm as he
thought they would be. Dirk sits up, and Jake follows him, chasing his mouth.
Dirk's breath is hot on his face. He's sitting in his lap, and Jake can feel
that Dirk is aroused, and then Dirk's hands at his belt.

This is the part, in the movie version, where one of them breaks off. He's seen
this scene play out in a dozen flicks. There's a blush and someone says 'I'm
not ready yet, I want it to be special, can't we wait?' and then the other
person agrees. That's what's supposed to happen right now. But Dirk fumbles
around in his boxers and then grips and Jake whines against his mouth and
decides that he's one hundred percent ready, he doesn't care if it's special,
and he'll die if he has to wait.

"Shit," Dirk is saying, kissing along his jaw and up to his ear. "Shit, Jake.
Shit. It's really you, this is -- this is actually --"

Jake groans deep and low as Dirk strokes him. He grips his shoulder blades
tight and pants against his ear. He wants to say something back, but he doesn't
know what to say or how to say it.  He settles on just: "Dirk."

Dirk whimpers. If anything, hearing his name seems to have been the best thing
that happened to him, yet.

Well -- well, Jake can do better than that. He withdraws his fingers from where
he's carved half-moons against Dirk's shoulders and trails them down his back.
He hums and groans as Dirk keeps working him. He finds Dirk's waistband.

Dirk freezes. "You --" he gulps against Jake's ear. "You don't have to, if you
don't --"

Jake sweeps frustration away. "I want to," he promises. Dirk gasps and mewls
when Jake's fingers find him. He's not thick, but he's really long. Jake is
suddenly embarrassed by his own size in comparison, but he flushes and keeps it
bottled and strokes Dirk. They move in time with each other, gasping, panting,
and groaning against each other. They kiss again. Again. Jake has a second to
remember that they're sitting in the shattered bones of some weird lizard
monster just before he loses it, mind blanking out and shouting against Dirk's
ear.

Somewhere between this and when he remembers his name, Dirk has come, too. He's
not sure if he did it, or if Dirk managed himself. Just that Dirk's heart is
pounding against his, and he's dizzy with satisfaction, and everything seems
pretty darned aces.

Dirk is moving around a bit, and Jake rolls over. Maybe this wasn't the best
location to do this. Probably it was. Very cinematic.

"Hey," Dirk says, and Jake sits up. He pushes his glasses up his nose -
- they've come all askew -- and Dirk is looking over his shoulder at him.
"Looks like I found where our friend came from." He peers down. "Better put
your mask back on." He grins. "Let's loot this bitch."

**

Hours later, their grist caches packed pretty full and high off the excitement
of discovery, they land back at Dirk's apartment. Jake takes off his mask and
kisses the back of Dirk's neck before he gets off the board, and Dirk gives him
an affectionate look.

The day was amazing. It was pretty close to perfect, actually. Solving puzzles,
spending time together, looting tombs, fighting monsters, and, um. Getting to
know each other better. Jake flushes and grabs his foot to stretch out his
calf, and a thought suddenly comes into his head with crystal clarity.

Gosh, I can't wait to get back to Lomax.

He stops in place. He doesn't like the thought, so he sweeps it away, but it
doesn't go anywhere. It won't go. It sits there, and he realizes that when he
thinks of his planet's spooky, peaceful silence and empty skies and no one in
sight, it makes him feel... relieved.

That can't be right.

He turns away, hiding his face while Dirk stows the board. What the fuck?
Yesterday morning, he was pretty sure he was gonna go stonk raving bonkers if
he had to spend another moment in his planet's empty silences. Today, he had
one of the best days of his life with Dirk. And now, suddenly, the idea of a
few days surrounded by nothing but his own thoughts is like the thought of a
cool glass of water.

There's something wrong with me.

"If you need a shower, you can go first," Dirk says, coming up behind him and
laying a hand on his shoulder. "And, uh. You can have the bed again, tonight,
if... if, you know, you don't want to... um." He cleared his throat. "Uh,
right. You can have the bed tonight."

"Thanks a million," Jake says. What he really wants to say is 'do you mind
dropping me back off at my land for tonight? You can pick me up first thing in
the morning and we can mess around with that alchemiter and then dig right on
back into the tombs!' That sound good. That sounds perfect. But how can he?
What a shitty fucking thing to say. So he turns and gives Dirk a big smile, and
Dirk looks startled and then smiles back. The sort of smile Jake hasn't really
seen from him before. The sort of smile that can melt even the coldest heart.

"I can't believe you're really here," Dirk says softly, and then, clearing his
throat, takes off toward the entrance back into the apartment.

Jake shakes off his strange, unfair longing for Lomax. It doesn't really go
away, but he thinks he can ignore it. He watches Dirk move, instead. The swing
of his hips, the way his nice fancy hair is flattened in spots where Jake
pulled and stroked it. He feels the thrill again. Maybe he'll take Dirk up on
that tacit offer. There are all sorts of things he wants to try, and it's a
queen sized bed.

(But once he lets him in, he probably won't get a night to himself again.)

Fuck. He can't wait to get back to the tombs. He can't wait to watch movies
together. He can't wait to get his hands back under Dirk's clothes.

There. Better.

"I'm friggin starving," he says, swallowing all of it down and hurrying after
Dirk. "Have you got any more of those peaches?"
End Notes
     My inspiration for this fic is "Jake has a really great day with Dirk
     where pretty much everything goes good, but he still comes out of it
     feeling utterly socially exhausted." It came from a pretty personal
     place. As a 100% introvert myself, I really identify with Jake. He's
     my favourite character in Homestuck and I don't see a lot of fics
     that really get into his head in a way that does him justice. I
     really wanted to capture the way that wanting to be alone doesn't
     always mean that anything is wrong, how even positive social
     interactions can be draining, and to explore the love-hate
     relationship introverts have with solitude and silence. Here's hoping
     that before their dead-eyed soccer romp, Dirk and Jake learned how to
     communicate and respect one another's boundaries.
     I hope everyone enjoyed this fic :)
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